Is it ok to be jealous?

I am not a bad person no I don't think so .. So why is it when someone else gets something I want I turn into a two year old laying on the floor kicking my feet ranting no one loves me.. I have been struck hard by the little green monster.. I try not to let it get to me some people are just better than others. But what you they have I don't? Personality.. So I do not have a brown spot on my nose.. So I am not a college graduate or a high school one for that..

I have a brain and I think I am a good person ....I hope I come across as a good person.. I am creative.. I have a good head on my shoulder .. I can take responsiblilty and have follow through I have never caused anyone undo stress .. So what did I do ..


have you ever felt that some place was created for you as a pacfier something to make you feel like a good person yet you are nothing more than a place holder until you are either frustrated or depressed to the point why get out of bed at all?

Well I can't lay in bed wallowing in self pity trust me if I could I would I still get up do my daily jobs but I am starting to wonder if I should just take care of my kids crochet my heart out and forget the rest..

I reached out to the computer world because their are people out there to me I can talk to them with no fear I mean I am afraid to check my mail if a living breathing human is outside .. I attempt to talk to someone and I either turn read and can't speak then head for the restroom to fight with my own fears the rest of the day being ill or find a "excuse" not to have to met anyone..

So I find Jealousy are far thing from me but now I just feel depressed and forgotten and ashamed for feeling it ..

Ok I am done feeling sorry for myself I can rest easy knowing unless someone is really bored reading my blog they will just think I am in need of a nappy change and a nap thanks for listening and feel free to post a comment